“My name is Eobard Thawne. With the help of Damien Darhk, Malcolm Merlyn, Leonard Snart, and Mick Rory, I’ve obtained the Spear of Destiny, an ancient artifact with the power to rewrite reality itself. And we have. It’s a brave new world.”
Welcome to Doomworld, the Legion of Doom’s version of a perfect reality. Sara and Amaya, clad in head to toe tight black leather, are hunting down a vigilante in Star City. They catch her, and it turns out to be Arrow’s Felicity Smoak! In a mask and costume! She gets in a good dig before they cart her off to Mayor Damien Darhk, calling then the Bimbo Brigade.
Damien is pleased with his pet assassins. He has them kill Felicity right then and there in his office. Due process does not exist in Doomworld, to absolutely no one’s surprise. He adds Felicity’s mask to his collection, which already includes those of every other Star City Vigilante: Arrow, Black Canary, Ragman, Wild Dog, Mr Terrific, The Flash, Spartan, Speedy. Felicity didn’t get a code name. 😥 Or would she still use Overwatch? Doesn’t seem to fit when she’s out in the streets.
Meanwhile, over in Central City, Eobard has placed himself back in charge of Star Labs, which he built and ran for many years while he was impersonating Harrison Wells on The Flash. It’s too bad that they couldn’t work out the budgets and shooting schedules to make this a bit more of a crossover episode. Cisco and Caitlin should really be here, maybe even Eobard’s original surrogate son, Hartley Rathaway. I think he really enjoyed having Cisco and Hartley fight over him.
Eobard has taken care of his time remnant problem by keeping Black Flash locked up in Star Labs. Black Flash must be part of the speed force, and unkillable. Why didn’t Eobard’s version of reality include making himself fully alive again, instead of just a time remnant? I thought that was the point of this whole thing. Maybe the Spear only changes current reality, not the past? Let Eddie live!
Malcolm shows up demanding a meeting and another shot at the Spear. His wife and his son, Tommy, are alive again, his daughter Thea adores him, his League of Assassins rival and Sara’s former lover Nyssa Al Ghul is living a closeted life in Ohio, and he has two hands again. Eobard can’t understand what more Malcolm could want? (Malcolm ordered Sara’s death on Arrow, then Sara’s sister used a form of magic to bring her back to life against Nyssa’s wishes.)
Malcolm wants to use the Spear to tidy up a few loose ends. Eobard intends to retain complete control of the Spear from now on. He’s memorized the incantation required to activate it, and destroyed the manuscript that contained the original text.
Jax arrives to report to Eobard. He and Stein work for Star Labs. Stein is building something for Eobard, and Jax is his supervisor, tasked with keeping Stein overworked and unhappy. None of the Legends have their powers in this reality. Malcolm tells Eobard that it’s foolish to keep the Legends around to toy with. They should be killed, so they can’t cause problems. He also wants to know what Eobard is having Stein build, but Eobard refuses to say.
Mick and Len are rushing out of a bank they’ve just robbed. They’re surrounded by police, so Mick starts to fire the heat gun at them. Len tells him not to bother. They own the police now. They can go rob another bank, or set up a chase, or get thrown in Iron Heights prison so that they can break out again like old times. (Prison Break reference!) Whatever they want. Mick thinks there’s no point, since they own half the city already. Their argument is cut short when Eobard summons them to a meeting. Mick questions why they have to drop everything for Eobard. Len says that they owe Eobard for agreeing not to erase Mick and the rest of the Legends from history.
Rip and his faithful cooking assistant, Gideon, are busy perfecting their cake decorating skills. We’re not told their location, but Rip is clearly going insane with boredom, wherever it is. Once he’s perfected his latest creation, Gideon suggests he try sending out another distress signal. Rip yells at her that there’s no point, the Legion are like gods now that they have the Spear. Rip really needs to develop some optimism.
Jax takes a lot of pleasure in his work, as he informs Stein that there won’t be any time off until the reactor project is ready to go online. He throws a framed photo of Stein’s wife and daughter across the room to emphasize his point. Janitor Ray Palmer assures Stein that he’ll clean up the mess.
Eobard called Mick and Len to discuss what to do about Malcolm. Before they get very far, Nate Heywood rushes in. He drew the short straw this week, and is wearing Oliver’s bad flashback wig. The flashback wig is often a signal that we’re in a dystopia. Or the character is in a lot of trouble. Or both. He starts rambling on, as is his way, about reality not being quite right, and having scars that allow you to see where it’s been tampered with. He figured Eobard is the one person smart enough to fix it. Nate’s not wrong, just stupid. Eobard sends Len and Mick to do his dirty work for him. Nate Heywood must die.
Len and Mick walk Nate to his doom in some wooded area as Nate rambles on and on about his blog and his theories and how no one reads them, so he’s not dangerous unless he’s right. Oh wait, is he right? Did you ever notice how much Nate talks? He has more lines than any other three characters combined.
Len is ready to kill Nate, but Mick stops him. Mick isn’t happy with the way Doomworld turned out. Len insists he’s got a plan to make things better, but won’t share it with Mick. So Mick knocks him out and runs off with Nate. He’s switching sides again.
They drive to Star City to find Ray so that he can help them fix reality. Ray’s been having memory leaks, or what Nate calls reality scars, too. He’s built a device that will restore the Legends’ memories of the original reality. They restore Nate’s memories first, then Ray’s. Both punch Mick in the face after they get their memories back.
The Legion, minus Eobard, meet to discuss Mick’s deception. They decide to send Amaya and Sara to kill him. Len hands them a GPS tracker. He’s chipped Mick, since he doesn’t trust anyone. This Len isn’t really the original Len from the Flash. That guy would’ve hated having the robberies rigged to succeed (boring), and wouldn’t have ever trusted the rest of the Legion over Mick.
When Amaya and Sara find Mick with Nate and Ray, the boys try to stimulate the girls’ original memories, which sounds dirtier than it is, though Nate does lead with mentioning him and Amaya having sex. Because obviously that would have been the most memorable thing that ever happened to her. In Nate’s dreams. It doesn’t jog Amaya’s memories. As they fight, Ray shoots the memory device at Sara. She gets her memories back and punches Mick, as required.
They all go to Nate’s place to hide out, which is his mom’s basement. He insist’s that he pays rent, so it’s really his place, but his mom is providing them with sandwiches, so his independence is still questionable. They decide that Sara should go back to Damien and play along until she can get Amaya back.
Rip has continued his cake decorating, rum drinking, and floor sleeping. Gideon has also been multitasking. She’s been repairing the ship while babysitting Rip. She informs him that she’s figured out a way to redirect more power to the distress signal. She needs his help. Rip’s going to vomit, because cake and rum really aren’t a good mix on an empty stomach, then he’ll be ready to get to work. Gideon knows how to motivate her man.
The Legion, sans Eobard, are planning how to get rid of him for good since he’s ruining their Doomworld fun. Amaya returns first, and reports that she and Sara failed to kill Mick, then got separated in the fight. Sara returns next, but Damien senses that she has her memories back. He tries to get her to slip up by talking about how much fun it was to kill her sister Laurel, aka the Black Canary. Sara cracks after a minute. Darhk stops her attack using magic, saying the first thing he did in this reality was reacquire it. Then he orders Amaya to kill Sara. Sara pulls out the memory device and shoots it at Amaya, restoring her memories. She and Amaya fight their way out. Len chastises Damien for getting too caught up in his bad guy monologue, giving them time to escape.
Sara and Amaya find Jax in a parking lot and restore his memories. They take him to Nate’s basement, so that he too can feast on Nate’s mom’s sandwiches, which are apparently the best in the world. We should all feel a lot less sorry for him over having had a lousy father, because he seems to have a really awesome mother to make up for it. But mothers are irrelevant in the Berlantiverse, and most of the TV world. It’s only in the real world, where we actually do more than our share of the parenting work, that we matter. This week’s episode of Girls, “The Bounce” had some excellent commentary on that. Boys longing for their absent fathers, to the point of forgetting to appreciate the mothers who raised them.
Jax describes what he knows about the project that Eobard has Stein working on. It’s a reactor that will burn 1,000 times hotter than the sun. Eobard will be able to use it to incinerate the Spear, so that the current reality will become permanent. They need to get the Spear back and use it. Sara asks Amaya to be the one to use it. She thinks Amaya was right, they should have used the Spear back in World War 1. Amaya says that at that point she might have used it to change her own future, but now they have nothing to lose.
Mick remembers that the incantation was in Aramaic, so Nate goes to see if he can find a copy of it. Jax questions how Mick would recognize Aramaic. He says he loved the film The Passion of Christ. But, also, HE WAS CHRONOS, PEOPLE. He has all sorts of knowledge. Do you think the life of Christ isn’t something time travelers would try to fool around with all the time? I can imagine Chronos having to deal with time issues in that period constantly. It makes me crazy that they forget that he was Winter-Soldiered, and the amount of time he was gone was much, much longer for him than them.
Eobard stops by Stein’s lab to harass him over his work ethic. Eobard’s death threat convinces Stein to get the reactor online immediately, though it will take a while for the core to reach its peak temperature. It actually looks like the fiery pits of Mordor inside. I can’t wait to see who loses a finger. It’s become such an overused dramatic device these days, how can they resist? But that’s for the season finale. Eobard leaves Stein to monitor the reactor while it heats up, even though Stein hasn’t seen his family in weeks.
The Legends finalize their plan. Jax will restore Stein’s memory, then everyone but Mick will somehow destroy the reactor that’s 1000 times hotter than the sun, even though they don’t have their powers and the Legion will surely be waiting for them. They leave Mick at home because they blame him for turning the Spear over to the Legion in the first place. What were they going to do if he didn’t? Keep fighting to the death over it? Watch while one of the Legion took it from them? They were beat, either way. Mick made sure they ultimately had an inside man. But, with Len on the other side, there’s no one with any talent for practical long-term strategic thinking on the Legends team. Sara’s great in the moment at keeping things moving and efficient, but not great at thinking several steps ahead, like Len. That’s why Mick always ends up back with Len. He prizes efficiency and a sort of professionalism as much as Len does.
Anyway, Sara makes the same mistake all over again, and leaves Mick behind, telling him he’s not part of the group, even after he was the one who saved them and remembered the incantation. Sara seems to think Mick will be a good dog and just sit in Nate’s basement. Instead, he meets up with Len, Malcolm and Damien. They decide to grab the Spear themselves while Eobard is busy fighting off the Legends.
Stein destroys the memory device before Jax can use it, then triggers a silent alarm. The rest of the Legends arrive just before Eobard. Eobard is furious that Malcolm will get to say “I told you so,” because he warned Eobard that keeping them alive was stupid. He’s about to destroy the Spear in the reactor when the rest of the Legion arrives. Mick shoots the Spear out of Eobard’s hand. Eobard starts monologuing, but Len gets bored and shoots him across the room with the cold gun. An epic game of keep away follows, with the Legends and the Legion working together and against each other. Eventually the Spear comes to Mick, the man in the middle. Everyone calls for him to pass the Spear to them. Len calls on their partnership, but Mick says he’s no longer Len’s dog. Their relationship was never written that way before this episode. They argued, sometimes very physically, sometimes even broke up for a while, but were always equals in the end.
Mick gives the Spear to Amaya and tells her to fix reality. She begins the incantation, but Len fires his gun at her, freezing her solid. He walks over and smashes her into little pieces, taking the Spear at the same time. The rest of the Legends watch, devastated. Mick raises his heat gun to fire at Len, but can’t bring himself to do it.
Eobard speeds in and takes the Spear from Len. This time he quickly throws the Spear into the reactor, destroying it. A giant beam of white light rises from the reactor up into the sky for a moment. This reality is now permanent. Sara vows to kill the Legion. Then Eobard can’t resist another monologue, gloating over his win, and how the rest of them are now forced to live in his reality forever.
Later, back in Nate’s mom’s basement, the Legend’s realize that there is one possibility for change left open to them. If they can find Rip and the Waverider, they can go back in time and use the Spear before the Legion ever gets it.
Rip and Gideon have finally completed the necessary adjustments and are ready to broadcast the distress signal. Rip joins two giant cables, and the signal works. The camera pulls back to show a miniaturized Waverider on display in Eobard’s office at Star Labs.
Two women in this entire giant cast, and they kill one of them. The one who’s a woman of color. One of only three people of color in the cast, and Wentworth Miller only just returned.
I love the way that Legends has taken to using its opening voice overs as part of its current episode, rather than a pat introduction. The changing narrators and text add another unpredictable, eccentric element to the show.
Why didn’t Eobard’s version of reality include making himself fully alive again, instead of just a time remnant? I thought that was the point of this whole thing. Let Eddie live! Maybe the Spear only changes current reality, not the past? So it’s still only changing the surface of reality, which would be why everyone’s memories could be brought back so easily. They were just under the surface of the veil of illusion that the Spear creates. It probably moves them to another dimension that fits the parameters of the wish, rather than actually rewriting reality.
This may be Arthur Darvill’s greatest episode. His physicality was comedy brilliance. That man can do anything.
More proof that Doomworld is a dystopia: Trump is still president, and not only awarding Eobard medals, but also inviting him for dinner and rounds of golf at his resort hotels.
By the end of the episode, I’d lost track of how many times Mick had switched sides. That’s ridiculously un Mick-like. He and Len were known to have big arguments, but they’d be loyal to each other in the face of everyone else. If this Len didn’t feel like the “real” Len to Mick, then he would have made that decision and stuck with it. Mick isn’t a flip-flopper.
There’s no way they won’t bring Amaya back to life. How many times have they told us that she has to go back to the 1940s and have her daughter so that the future timeline is preserved? Right now, it seems like there’s a 70% chance that Nate’s going with her.
Next week, it’s back to 1916, to break every rule this show’s ever made for time travel.