Sheila and Joel have done the thing that criminals always do, and they really need to learn not to do, if they’re going to become serial killers: returned to the scene of the crime. They’re still having the “did she or didn’t she” debate about Loki. When you’re married, some disagreements are just never-ending.
Sheila thinks she didn’t accidentally bite Loki, because she didn’t get that satisfying tingle that she gets when she draws blood for a kill. In her vagina. Joel tries not to be disturbed by his wife’s new murder kink, but the compromises that he’s making for the marriage are adding up quickly. Even with frequent, adventurous sex, he’s having trouble keeping up with the rapid fire changes and new demands. He blames himself for letting Loki escape. Sheila reassures Joel that she loves him for who he is, not who he thinks he should be. And Loki has clearly skipped town.
They give up on the stake out to head over to Dan and Lisa’s party. The men talk about murder and the women talk about sex, as usual. The girls suggest that Sheila try murdering alone, since Joel isn’t very good at it. Wait, that’s murder, not sex. Well, the two are closely related, for Sheila.
Dan has another job for Joel. This time it’s a sex trafficker. Dan’s not taking Joel’s advice to be nicer to Eric, or anyone else. This will catch up with him, eventually.
Eric and Abby make Princess Leia/burger bun jokes to work out their awkwardness over the kiss, then decide to raid Dan’s police supplies again for fun. They discover that Dan is a crooked cop who has drugs, cash, weapons and more stashed inside the wall of the garage. They steal some of the cash to use for a good time, like any responsible citizens would.
Sheila has realized that her pen, with their realtor information printed on it, fell out of her purse at Loki’s apartment. They have to return to the scene of the crime again. Seriously, they need to do mission run throughs, and scale back what they bring to the minimum necessary for the job, with all of it sealed up tight. Common sense, people. Think like a STRIKE Team. Or, you know, a successful serial killer. What would Hannibal Lecter do? WWHLD
Joel tells Sheila that Dan wants them to kill a sex trafficker. Sheila appreciates the tip on a bad person she can eat without guilt. She thinks they can use Dan more than he uses them. Joel doesn’t want any part of it. They come to an agreement that Sheila will kill and process her victims on her own from now on, wearing her stylish new pink kill poncho. Joel will handle the other aspects of the operation, like retrieving pens from murders gone wrong.
Abby and Eric take Dan’s cash to the comics store. Abby wants Eric to buy himself something pretty something to make him happy, since he’s helped her family out so much. He tells her that what he really wants is to get Dan back for all of the times he’s humiliated Eric. Abby’s totally up for a prank, but Eric’s going to pull it off wearing Kevin Bacon’s hat from Tremors.
Sheila waits for the sex trafficker in a parking garage. She spots him near the elevator and approaches for the kill in her pink kill poncho and rubber gloves. She totally blends in. No one would notice her. But then Lisa steps out of the elevator, and into the sex trafficker’s arms. He’s not a sex trafficker, he’s Bob, her boyfriend. Shockingly, Dan lied.
Joel goes to Loki’s apartment to find the pen. He finds Loki’s snake instead, and let’s out a yelp when he’s startled by it. Loki’s friends arrive to party with him and are shocked at the disaster they find in the apartment. They force Joel to wait with them until another friend/drug dealer, Marcus, gets there, who’ll make the decision about what to do with Joel.
Joel has a conversation with Marcus’ girlfriend that makes him realize that he’s been selfish about helping Sheila with the more difficult aspects of her condition. When he gets home they talk about it. Sheila says she also realized that she prefers to have him with her for support, even though she can technically do it on her own, just like childbirth. Joel vows to put aside his issues and be more present. He’ll go talk to Dan about their situation and work something out, now that they have some blackmail material on him.
Abby and Eric set up a flashbang to go off in Dan’s rose garden the next time that he works in it.
Joel finds Dan working in the rose garden the next day. He tells Dan that they won’t be killing for him any more because they have evidence to show that he’s been blackmailing them. Dan turns it around and describes how the same evidence could be used against Joel and Sheila, then describes how he’d plant even more evidence to solidify the case.
Dan gets to the point of threatening to arrest Sheila, and telling Joel that he’s Dan’s bitch. He says that Sheila wears the pants in the family, and Joel is practically useless. Joel’s had enough, and whacks Dan in the head with a shovel, killing him. Dan’s body falls onto the flashbang and sets it off, like a giant fart.
Through most of the episode, Joel is wavering between an identity crisis and a mid-life crisis as he feels his age and ineptitude at becoming a murderer and criminal in order to provide for his wife and keep his family safe. His masculinity is threatened over and over, as he has to deal with Sheila being the breadwinner and an independent woman. This is a situation they’d already dealt with in their marriage, but having all of the issues thrown in Joel’s face again, in new ways, is making him question himself and his worth all over again.
Dan proves what an abuser and predator he is by instinctively knowing where to hit Joel hardest, psychologically, for maximum damage. He fails to take into account the strength of Joel’s love for his family and how far he’s already gone for them, though. Joel was primed to take the next step of doing the killing himself, both to prove his masculinity to himself, and to protect and provide for his family. And probably to get Dan to shut up about the ants.
Joel’s getting pretty good at multitasking. First he helped save Marcus’ relationship and found the pen. Now he’s found Sheila’s food source for the next week while getting rid of an obnoxious neighbor and threat to his family’s safety. It’s got to be hella good for his battered self-esteem.
Princess Leia hair jokes. 😢 Too soon. Cute, but sad, too.
Abby: Help me Eric-wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope.
Dan: Girls, Joel, he sells girls. What kind of asshole doesn’t kill a guy like that? You’re worse than he is.
Sheila: Maybe we need to change our perspective on this. Maybe Dan is working for us, and he’s like our little truffle pig leading us to tasty morsels. Joel: That may be the most beautiful thing anyone’s ever said about Dan.
Eric: Groot’s not a stick, he’s a plant that believes in the power of community.
Joel: From now on, we fuck everything up together.
Metawitches 
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